Trading my dreams for His...

In the past weeks I was blessed to learn three things, that helped me quite a lot. I am not sure, what happened to me this spring, but somehow I fell into a state of mind, that could easily be called a depression, I was so unhappy and unsatisfied with each and every situation in my life, it was very sad... :-(!
But then I learned these three things and now I am doing better...

1. If God promises to do something, He will fulfill it -> but part of the process is waiting and trusting in Him and in what He has told me to believe, which means to fully rely on Him!
2. Times of worry and sorrow are normal, every biblical character had to go through such times, and these were the times when they actually were trained for life! In times of sorrow and struggles, God teaches us to be faithful and enduring to fight for His kingdom and believe in Him even though all circumstances seem to speak against His existance!
3. If something means really much to you, you need to be willing to give it up for the kingdom of God! I am trying to say, that I learned to pray, the way Jesus prayed in Gethsemane, He prayed; "Father please let this cup pass me by, but not my will be done but yours!"
   I had to learn to pray this way, and what can I say, that really hurt me... it hurts to let go of the things I hold so thight, but I know that it was good, and so finally not my will but His may be done!

Exciting to see, how this will change my life... God is there, He is real, and even though I might not always hear His voice or feel His presence He is still embracing me... THANK YOU!

Could someone quiet the squirrels, please?

Sometimes I feel like I do not have any chance to be me...
Last week for example, when we sat there as a group, and the squirrels were talking, talking and talking, leaving me little chance to say something without being loud...
but that wasn't the real problem - in fact, their expectations and thoughts were it - they already figured a way that I have to behave in certain situations, so if I behave differently they wonder and try everything to force me into the role they figured to work for me...
They do not force me by words or actions, just their thoughts and interactions can be enough...

Luckily it did not work out completly, God still enables me to do and be, who I really am... nevermind what others think or how they would like me to behave!

that Post was written on March the 1st, now over 3 months later... the problem is still existing :-(